happy valentines...

Just minutes ago the sky was bright blue and bright and blue and the only sound i really heard was the ticking of the clock and the softly annoying sound of the spinning fan under the boards of my bedroom floor. There were giant birds, perhaps turkey-pheasants, a ponyanda, some other indescribable creatures with no given names. I had big plans. I wanted to cross the lake, the river, wanted to take the subway and go really far to a place I did not know yet. Unexplored, yet unexplored by me only. Big Adventure Digest. (Quite honestly the only place I want to visit is somewhere 50% between the park and the ocean...) Now that the rice bowl is empty and the lime tree cropped, the leaves cut into tiny parallelograms, the avocado plants deprived of any leaves for now, bonsai training at its worst, now that all this is done, the sky is turning a less and less saturated soupy something. It almost feels like back in that country where the year has three days, each of them with more than a hundred instances of sunrise, ten sunsets, and yet each one of them packed with a slightly unhealthy level of passive agression. I will now pack my bag and pockets and walk into this valentine's day. It is mid february already? It is almost march? The year is in full swing, I see. Looking at some nice drawings on my desk, they are dated back to 2002. Yet another nauseating observation. I have not been to manhattan for days now. I will walk and ride to resurface in the almost center of the island. By this evening I will be a different person, again. And maybe the further I will be twisted, the more I will be myself. I hope this will be the case. Somehow, since I still believe in something good in the core of my core. The comments on this site here have been shut down by my host. This stopped all spam with one kick of a giant virtual boot. I moved all of the email I failed to reply to into a "read" folder on my drive. It feels like this today could be a new beginning of something. Somehow. Each day should be, shouldn't it?... Could the sky be more gray or grey... what is the difference? I wonder what ever happened to that ponyanda... happy valentines...