that shaky ground... that is not...

and whenever it appears that things are completely clear, this is the moment when they begin to not be. and when everything looks completely established, this is when it begins to not be. and when everything appears calm, this might be the beginning of a storm, and when things look very dark, then there might be some light around one of the corners... and when i look around here and I see the images and the words of which some traveled so far to be with me. some of them were here before. some of them came with me for the ride. and we are here, in this perfect moment just about now and now only and this perfect moment is here to never return in this particular way. it will be so completely different tomorrow. it really will be. not only tomorrow... in a few split seconds... there... this humming was much more quiet wasn't it?... and what about this pain in the leg? there are voices around the corner now... some familiar. some definitely are not. i can not express how much i am looking forward to going to the desert. i hope that there will be nothing. and i know that there will be everything. and both possibilities are perfectly fine. and i will dive through the experience and the experience will just blow right through me, with little particles stuck to every atom of me. it is all good... somehow... at some point... i am now smiling just to cheer myself up, with all might, somehow... please. good. that shaky ground is not even a ground... i think... and the balance of things is neither balance nor things... well... maybe...