The lamps cast interesting shadows on walls and ceiling. The sounds of Broadway could almost be mistaken for the beating of waves against a high, rough ocean coast. The air has cooled down substantially. I am sitting in a chair far away from the slightly open window and I can feel how the cool air is spilling into the apartment. My head is too warm, my lap is hot from the powerbook... even my right foot is warmer than the left one, the one actually resting on the carpet.
I am holding on to this Sunday. I know what will have to get done tomorrow, it will be a manageable amount of work... I know where I will have lunch tomorrow, I will finally return the camera with which I shot that Selfportrait with Sockdog...
My mind feels like a pendulum right now, swinging from the past, quickly bypassing the present, into the future, just to return in the same rush, pass the present and to return to the past... I should have gone to sleep more than an hour ago, calm down this silly movement, try to let thoughts rest in the present, real time. But maybe this is what some part of me is afraid of?...
Could this be what makes living easier sometimes, for some of us?... Do we like to somehow imagine worlds ahead of us, and dwell on those behind us in order to just somehow sneak by the things we should be really doing now?...
Sleep, sleep is what I need right this minute... and no more writing for me today. Not even some short little posts. Good night. : )
"Do we like to somehow imagine worlds ahead of us, and dwell on those behind us in order to just somehow sneak by the things we should be really doing now?"...
wow, that is a fantastic observation there. now that i think about it, sometimes it does feel easier to get all tangled up in the past or fret/fantasise about the future rather than contend with the nasty deadlines and unwashed dishes of the present.
hey - maybe you should take another pic before you hand the camera back, it's been awhile since the last one. we want to see how stripey is doing these days... he must be a big fat ol' dog by now... does he roll over? does he fetch your powerbook in the morning?
"... my lap is hot from the powerbook... "
guess it's why they now call it a "notebook" as opposed to a "laptop"...
please do take more pictures of stripey. will he be dressing up for halloween? will you be taking him trick or treatin'?
hindsight is 20/20... looking back helps us learn about ourselves... looking forward gives us hope, something to strive for... sometimes the present is too much to bear all at once, so our mind takes little trips back n' forth until we are strong enough to deal... let it take it's course... trust yourself... all will fall into place... trust in yourself.