“The vapours of the substances contained in this tube are known to cause cancer in the state of California.” (Boy, am I lucky to be on that other coast, nothing can happen to me here…)
This reminds me of the one time when I called the 1-800 number that was on the back of a little toothing toy I bought in a pharmacy a few years ago. (It was for a co worker friend, so she would finally stop chewing on my ball point pens, making them look like… no I can’t write that here.)

Witold: Hello, I bought this toy here, and it is a very nice toy, it is filled with water and has little animals floating in it. It is cute and soft and most definitely made out of PVC, now I am a little worried if the chemicals that make the toy soft might in some way harm the child if they decide to actually chew on your cute little toy?

Operator: Are you in Canada, Sir?
Witold: Ahem, why are you asking?
Operator: Are you in Canada, Sir?
Witold (looking out the window onto downtown Manhattan): Oh, let’s say I am in Canada…
Operator: Sir, please take the toy away from your child immediately.
Witold: Right now?
Operator: Yes, please, Sir, please take away the toy.
Witold: Wow, these are very strong words…
Operator: Sir, please take away the toy.
Witold: Okay, well, what if I am not in Canada… let’s say I am in New York.
Operator: Then it’s okay.
Witold: Wow
Operator: Yes, the toy is harmless.
Witold: But not to Canadian children?
Operator: Not in Canada Sir.
Witold: Is it a different toy for Canada?
Operator: No Sir, it is the same product.
Witold: So the children in Canada are just more sensitive?
Operator: It is a legal issue, Sir…
…

Maybe Canadians read Something like this, while in the US one would visit a site that is a Phtalates Information Center� (Why is there a � on Information Center?… maybe it is time to call Canada…)

Have I posted this story once before?… or twice?… did I chew on that toy?